How’d I Get to the Monks?
Strengthening protection while refining the flow of my days
Getting this giant boulder up the hill has been tough.
But it’s getting closer to the top, and I couldn’t have gotten it this far without each God-guided step along the way.
Let’s back up.
I grew up Catholic and went to Catholic school K–8, but seemingly missed about 95% of the lessons — because once I got to college, I veered, holding onto a professor’s claim that religion is just there for comfort.
At the time, I didn’t need comfort.
I was twenty — I needed answers.
There’s a reason for all of this. There has to be.
And I was — and still am — determined to piece as much of it together as I can.
From several solo camping trips across the country, to driving up the coast, to living in Jackson Hole, WY, and working on a farm in Hawaii, I was able to fill in a lot of blanks — connecting a lot of dots.
But the questions continued.
At the start of 2025, I found myself walking into Mass for the first time in years.
It felt… interesting. I couldn’t quite pinpoint the feeling, but I knew I was protected. So I kept going back.
More glitches beyond my control were piling up, so I leaned further in — going to confession regularly, building relationships with the priests.
But I needed more — stronger armor.
So I started meeting with a deacon each month. He became my Catholic ally — the one I’ve mentioned before, the faithful man who never lets me walk alone.
From there, I began joining Bible studies.
The concepts started connecting. I was lighting up from the connections I was articulating and from the people who shared a similar curiosity about the purpose of all this. I was starting to get it — and getting stronger too.
I could tell.
Because as the glitches continued around me, they weren’t affecting me the same way. I didn’t feel the need to engage. I was in alignment. The darkness was easier to move through.
It would slow me down long enough to feel it, but I’d quickly regain my footing and keep moving.
I no longer needed to externally process the glitches because I knew where to turn if I needed help finding my footing again.
I was protected.
And while that protection felt steady, the curiosity — and the questions — were still there.
Not only to continue strengthening my armor, but to improve the flow of my days — ensuring optimal energy.
I needed a place to reset — somewhere I was physically guided, so my mind could roam freely, yet still be directed toward alignment.
That’s where a retreat with the monks came into play.
As a gal on a mission to optimize her energy while staying aligned toward something sustainable, I was eager to learn from those closest to life on the narrow path.
I was curious how they structured their days, their diet, and what they might reflect back to me — where I was strong, and where I had blind spots.
With that structure and guidance in place, I layered in a 72-hour fast to fully dial in.
I’m still sorting through my time with the monks — and figuring out what from the weekend actually holds outside their self-built walls.
